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Page 10
“I’m sorry, sweetie,” Seth murmured. “I have to go home so I can work tomorrow.”
“Is it because we were bad?” Mackenzie mumbled, hiding her twisting face behind the fall of her red hair.
Erin made a choking noise, her heart surging up into her throat.
Anna stumbled over to Seth and clung to his leg. “I won’t be bad, Daddy. I’m sorry.”
Mackenzie nodded earnestly and looked like she wanted to hug his leg too. “We’ll be good. We promise. Please don’t go.”
Seth’s face broke momentarily from the pleading of his daughters. He lowered himself to kneel beside them. “No. No. I’d never leave because you were bad. I just have to work tomorrow. Please, don’t cry.”
Erin’s shoulders were shaking—the emotion of the day simply too much for her—and the sight of her husband trying to console their sad, confused daughters because he had to leave them was more than she could bear.
No matter how desperately she wanted a little more time, she just couldn’t do this to her family.
She was just about to open her mouth to say they could all go home with Seth, when he beat her to it.
“I can stay tonight,” he murmured, his voice gravelly as he struggled with emotion. “I’ll stay here tonight. I would never leave you because you were bad.”
He had both girls in his arms now, and both of them were crying—their sorrow transforming into relief. Erin was on the verge of breaking down herself, but she figured Seth didn’t have any room in his arms for another weeping female. So she managed to hold herself together.
When the storm died down, they piled on the couch and watched an animated movie, all of them too tired to do much else.
After they’d finally put the girls to bed, Erin closed their door quietly, feeling Seth standing directly behind her in the hallway.
She was so exhausted she was ready to slump to the floor.
When she turned around, he watched her with a quiet tenderness. “You're tired. I’ll sleep in the den again.”
Erin didn’t even have the energy to speak. Just shook her head. Silently took Seth’s hand.
Led him into her bedroom for the night.
Five
A week later, Erin took both of her daughters by the hand and led them into an elevator up to the posh offices of Seth’s law firm.
It was the first time the girls had been in the building, the first time they'd ever visited their father at work. At the moment, they appeared torn between nervousness and excitement, which was exactly how Erin felt herself.
The last week had gone well. Erin and the girls returned to Atlanta on Tuesday, and the whole family had been particularly loving and happy. Erin, of course, hadn’t expected anything else. Seth was far more attentive than normal—with her and with the girls—and he’d been home every evening by dinner time and hadn’t even gone into his home office to work later in the evenings, as had been his usual habit. The girls were thrilled to have him back and to have their family together again, and Erin herself had been on an exhausted high, after the stress of the previous month.
She knew this particular state of affairs wasn’t going to last indefinitely, however. Which was why she took comfort in the plan she and Seth had put together to ensure things didn’t fall apart again. They’d set up some appointments with a marriage counselor as well, just to keep the lines of communication open.
One of the ideas she'd had before she went home was for the girls to visit Seth at his office, so they would have some context in which to place Seth’s work, instead of thinking of it as some vague, mysterious burden on their lives. Even though he wasn’t going to be at the firm for much longer, it would be a few months before he transitioned into his own practice, and she didn’t want to wait that long.
Erin tried not to make a big deal about it when she mentioned the visit to the girls, since she wanted to keep it low-key and casual. Since it was something they’d never done before, however, the outing somehow became a big deal.
The girls talked about their impending visit all weekend, speculating endlessly about what they would see, who they would meet, what they would ask, and how they would act. Anna had woken up at five o’clock that morning because she was so excited about visiting Daddy at work.
When she declared she wanted to wear her favorite purple polka dot sundress to visit Daddy’s work, Erin saw no reason why not. Then Mackenzie, of course, decided she needed to look just as pretty, so she had put on a cute blue dress with a white collar and scalloped hem. Erin spent several minutes combing out the tangles in their hair. Then, at the last minute, Erin decided she looked kind of sloppy next to her pretty little girls, so she went to change quickly into a casual skirt and flattering top.
When they were finally ready to go, the girls were squirming with nerves and excitement and starting to get a little snippy.
Erin gave them a brief lecture about being good, not fighting, and being polite to everyone they met, as the driver took them over to the downtown building, but Erin’s belly was still doing flip-flops as she led them through the lobby and over to the elevators.
When Erin pushed the button for the top floor, Anna’s round eyes got even wider. “Daddy’s all the way up there? Does he work in a penthouse?”
Erin tried not to chuckle about the fact that her four year old daughter automatically associated the highest floor of a building with a penthouse. She smiled down at Anna. “No. But his office is on the top floor.”
“Daddy’s really important,” Mackenzie informed her little sister. “Important offices are on the top floor.”
“Oh!” Anna’s mouth was now as round as her eyes in response to this piece of wisdom.
They stood in silence while the elevator ascended, and—as the lit numbers progressed—Anna edged closer and closer to Erin, as if she were starting to get nervous.
Erin wasn’t surprised—since Anna was always initially shy in strange situations—but she didn’t want this to feel like some sort of unnatural experience for her daughters, so she tried to distract her by saying, “Your flower looks really pretty.”
Anna looked down at the little pot she carried, in which was growing an African violet with deep purple blooms. Almost a year ago, Erin and Anna had started the plant from a leaf cutting one afternoon when Anna was upset because Mackenzie had gone to play with a friend. Anna had hovered over the plant for months, waiting for the leaf to root and then helping Erin pot and water it. Finally, just last month, it had started to bloom at last, to Anna’s endless delight. Erin knew how precious the little plant was to her daughter.
Anna was going to give it to Seth today to keep in his office.
“It has five flowers,” Anna pronounced, holding the small pot carefully with both hands. Her fair eyebrows drew together as she added worriedly, “One of them got messed up.”
“It’s beautiful,” Erin assured her, stroking the soft hair. “Daddy will love it.”
Mackenzie had been peering at the pot intently. “You can’t see the messed up one. The leaves block it.”
When Anna relaxed at her sister’s affirmation, Erin smiled at Mackenzie in appreciation.
By that time, the elevator had reached the top floor, and the doors slid open smoothly, leading to the sleek, luxurious office suite.
Mackenzie had grown quiet as the doors opened, and now she straightened her shoulders, holding herself as proudly and gracefully as royalty. Erin figured she was probably a little nervous as well, but the girl would never admit it. She simply stepped out into the hall, her long hair a red-gold fall down her back.
Erin started to move off the elevator too, but then she realized Anna had edged behind her legs.
“It’s okay,” Erin encouraged, trying to draw her younger daughter out. “We’re going to see Daddy.”
Anna peeked out, was obviously intimidated by the polished, unfamiliar surroundings of the impersonal office building, and didn’t budge.
Mackenzie had turned around at the
delay. “Aren’t you going to give Daddy your flower?” she prodded, her unchildish composure revealing none of the hesitance she might feel.
Anna clutched the flower pot to her chest and stared up at Erin with pleading eyes.
With a sigh, Erin gently nudged Anna forward. “Sweetie, there’s nothing to be scared of. This is where Daddy works. He’s waiting to see us.” She stretched her hand out toward Anna and waited for the little girl to take it.
Anna had just tucked the pot against her side so she could hold it snugly with one arm and taken Erin’s hand when three men in business suits approached the elevator, giving Erin and the girls impatient looks.
Erin shot them an annoyed expression in return, partly because of their obvious arrogance and partly because their appearance startled Anna even more.
Finally, Anna consented to move forward, and Erin started with her daughters down the hall.
When they reached Seth’s office, Erin sighed resignedly as she realized they’d have to be greeted by Seth’s assistant, Carlotta.
Erin hated the woman. Most of the hatred was irrational, since Carlotta had never overtly offended or insulted Erin. But she was one of those sleek, perfectly coifed women that always made Erin feel like a sloppy, clumsy plebian.
As Erin approached the desk with the girls, Carlotta raised her dark, arched eyebrows and inquired, “May I help you?”
At the sound of this cool disinterest, Anna’s hand started trembling, causing Erin to bristle in repressed annoyance.
Erin was about to reply with a cool set-down of her own when Mackenzie stuck out her little chin and announced, “We’ve come to see Daddy.”
Then she stared at the woman with blue-gray eyes as unwavering as Seth at his best.
Before Carlotta could reply, Erin slanted her a speaking look. “I’m sure he told you we were coming.”
“Oh, yes,” the woman murmured. Then she tapped her long, manicured nails on her desk and said coolly, “I’m afraid he’s occupied at the moment. He’ll be with you presently.”
Clearing her throat, Erin said, “Why don’t you just let him know we’re here. He’ll want to know immediately.”
Carlotta still didn’t smile, but she didn’t argue. Just moved from behind her desk, her heels clicking on the floor as she walked toward Seth’s closed office door.
Before she got there, the door swung open, and Seth appeared, his body turned toward the man he was still talking to. Then the other man moved out of the office as well—an affluent middle-aged man with thinning hair and an authoritative air. They seemed to be at the tail end of a conversation and were talking in low, tense tones.
“No,” Seth pronounced, his voice one that brooked no dispute. “The answer is still no. You won’t change my mind.” He was in full work mode, and he hadn’t yet noticed that his family was present.
“You’re making a mistake,” the man replied, obviously angry and only barely holding onto the pretense of courtesy. “If you would just—”
“No.” Seth’s cold voice carried across the room, although he still wasn’t speaking very loudly. “You'll do well to leave it at that. I appreciate your coming in.”
Erin would never want to be on the receiving end of that particular look from Seth Thomas. At the moment, he was the man she rarely saw anymore--cold, unmovable, and utterly controlled.
The man she’d thought he was before she’d gotten to know him for real.
Erin was a little nervous about her daughters seeing their father that way, but there was nothing to do about it now. She held onto Anna’s hand and glanced down at Mackenzie, who was watching her father with quiet focus.
The man Seth was talking to mumbled out a response and then turned around, muttering under his breath in annoyance as he brushed past Erin and the girls.
It was only then that Seth saw they were standing there.
His expression was blank for a moment, as if he were startled by their appearance and was having trouble processing the shift in dynamic. Then he smiled warmly and walked over. “You’re here,” he said, stating the obvious to acknowledge his pleasure at their presence. With a quick glance at Carlotta, Seth added, “I should have been notified immediately.”
Then his face softened, although not as much as it did when he was safely at home, and he reached out a hand for Mackenzie. “Did you want to come see my office?”
When Mackenzie took his hand, Seth turned toward Anna. “You too?”
Anna had been leaning against Erin’s legs, but she nodded her head. “Yes, please,” she whispered, as if they were in a library and she needed to be quiet.
Erin saw Seth register the potted violet in Anna’s hands, and she could see the question shape itself on his lips. Catching his eye, she shook her head slightly and nodded toward the office.
They all traipsed into Seth’s office, and he closed the door behind them.
The girls stared around at awe at Seth’s huge, luxurious office. They were used to expensive furnishing and well-appointed surroundings, but—even by their standards—Seth’s office was somewhat imposing.
Seth barely noticed their preoccupation. He squatted down so he was on Anna’s level. “What do you have there?” he asked, gesturing toward the flower in her hand.
Anna thrust out the pot toward him. “It’s a present.”
Seth carefully accepted the pot, studying the dark green leaves and delicate purple blooms. “This is for me?”
“Yes. For Daddy.”
“Is this the violet you planted and took care of yourself?”
“Yes. I took care of it forever.”
“Are you sure you want me to have it? Or maybe I could keep it at home so you could see it more often.”
Frowning, Anna shook her head and restlessly swirled her skirt around her legs. “It’s for Daddy’s office. To make it pretty.”
Seth didn’t smile, but his expression no longer had a trace of the cold, ruthless attorney as he said, “Thank you. I’ve never seen a more beautiful flower.” Then he stood up and looked around the office. “Where should I put it?”
Now that her special duty was completed, Anna started to relax. She turned a full circle in the middle of the floor and then pointed to a low table near the wall of windows. “There.”
They all went over to see the grand placement of the violet on the table. It looked small and incongruous on the sleek expanse of polished wood, but they all declared it was perfect.
Mackenzie had half-watched the transference of the plant, but she was now staring out the huge window at the endless stretch of cityscape. “Can you see the whole city from here?”
Seth went over to stand next to her. “We can see a lot of it.” Turning Mackenzie slightly, he pointed. “And if you look closely, just over there, you can see home. Our building is way back there. Do you see it?”
Anna came running over so she could see their apartment building too, and they all peered until everyone had recognized it.
Mackenzie gazed up at Seth inscrutably. “Do you ever look at it sometimes? When you’re here and we’re there?”
Erin glanced over at her husband curiously, wondering if he ever did.
Seth’s expression was characteristically unrevealing when he murmured, “Sometimes I do.”
Anna, who had satisfied herself on the sight of their home, had started running around the office checking out random details. When she approached Seth’s huge office chair, she gasped, “Does Daddy sit here?”
“I do. Would you like to try it out?”
This delighted Anna, and she spent about three minutes trying to climb up into the chair. She wouldn’t accept any help, but because the chair was on wheels, she had some trouble pulling herself up. Finally, Seth came over to hold the chair steady, and Anna was able to situate herself.
She looked tiny against the black leather, and her purple polka dot skirt was hiked up around her bare legs, which were dangling down from the tall seat. She seemed very pleased with herself, however, a
nd she squealed in delight when Seth rolled her over to sit in front of his desk.
Mackenzie was still staring out the window, and something about her preoccupation made Erin wonder what she was thinking. To distract her, Erin asked cheerfully, “Didn’t you have something to give Daddy too, Mackenzie?”
Mackenzie twitched slightly, as if startled. Then she nodded her head and pulled a small framed photograph out of the little purse she carried that matched her blue dress. Handing it to Seth, she explained, “I painted the frame myself. Mommy gave me the picture.”
It was a snapshot Erin had taken of the girls one afternoon. They both were grinning as widely as they could, and they looked particularly pretty and happy in it.
Seth accepted the framed picture, studying it with a surprised smile. “It’s perfect. Thank you.”
“That way, you can think about us while you’re here.”
Something flickered briefly across Seth’s face before he leaned over to kiss Mackenzie on the forehead. “I think about you while I’m here all the time. But now I can look at this picture when I do. Should I put it with my other pictures?” He gestured over to a bookcase on the opposite wall, on which were situated several pictures of his family.
One of the photos had been taken by Liz six years ago, of Erin sitting in a rocking chair in the nursery of her old apartment, holding up a smiling, three-month-old Mackenzie.
Mackenzie thought about this earnestly for a minute or two, but she finally concluded, "It doesn't match the other pictures." This was undoubtedly true, since the childishly painted frame contrasted strongly with the expensive, polished frames of the other photos. "Can you put it next to Anna's flower?"
"Of course.” He set the frame next to the potted violet, and the two objects looked woefully out of place in cool, professional setting. But something about the sight of them made Erin feel strangely satisfied, as if their daughters had now marked their place here in Seth’s office.
“When Daddy changes offices and starts his new job, you’ll have to find a place for the flower and picture in his new office too.”